Maybe today’s society rewards the hares, or perhaps, it encourages or even forces us to be hares or be left in the dust. When I was younger I could run and get everything done and then collapse at night. When I bought my first car, I had a car payment and then the rent went up and wow, car insurance! I had to get a part-time job — I went to work at…

…Pizza Hut as a waitress so I could afford to eat. Literally, I would get a free personal pan pizza whenever I worked. Usually, I at least made enough in tip money to put gas in my car. Normally, I made a lot more if I got to work on Saturday night.

All my life I have tried to become a turtle (slow and steady), but, somehow my spirit is the hare.  I will say that as a single mom I often felt like the hare. It seemed like never enough time or money. Always in a hurry to get my kid to school and me to work and then back again. Weekends were housework and errands. So by the time I was worrying about saving money for retirement, I was already behind. And then there was saving for college!

I am sure many folks are familiar with the scenario. How do we catch up? What do we prioritize? Some experts have these strict “cash in the envelope” strategies for budgeting and say cut out your morning coffee or breakfast stop. Others are like go cold turkey and sell things, go bare bones, etc. to cut expenses. If you have credit card debt, things are even more dire.

The reality is that the best solution is something that you can and will do. Maybe you need to be the hare for a little while and look at how to do something quick to stop the money leaks — can you stop eating out and cook at home. Maybe buy a Keurig and make coffee at home before you run out the door. Eating out and buying expensive drinks are the common money thieves. However much this saves you, does it really help you catch up. It’s more like the hare starting to get a head but not actually winning the race. How long can you cut back — eventually, you will get tired and stop.

If you have credit card debt, due to the compound interest², you may still be losing ground. Well, of course the first step after stopping the money thieves, is to figure out how to get compound interest working in your favor.

If you haven’t heard of the “snowball” method. How it works, is a bit counter intuitive. You pay more on the card with the smallest balance while paying the minimums on the other cards. The goal is that you pay off the smallest card and then you can put that payment amount on the next card that has the next lowest balance and so on. I used that after my divorce to pay off my credit cards. If you do this while cutting back your spending -this works!

That said, if you need to — you may need a side-hustle (aka second job). Do you have a hobby that you can make some money? It could be as simple as baking cakes (folks at work may pay for a nice cake for a special occasion) or even just making hair bows (yes, someone I knew did this at night while she watched TV). The side hustle may only bring in a small amount of money but it almost counts as double – yes!! It’s money that doesn’t come out of your budget AND if it’s under a $400, you don’t have to claim as income. While $400 may not seem like much, it might cover a new coat or feed your holiday shopping fund.

You get the picture, the hare gets busy fast to make a dent. Next is the where the turtle wins the race. Many folks work at a job where there is a retirement savings plan (e.g. 401(k) or similar). Most companies will put money in if you do– they will match your contributions up to say 5% for example. If you do not contribute enough to get the match, then you are missing the best gift! I have coworkers who have told me they can’t afford to — actually you can’t afford not too! It may be hard at first but it’s literally free money. And you get a tax break on your contributions. Maybe you have to start after you get your credit cards paid or the easiest time to start is when you get a raise. If you get a 3% raise, put in 3% – it’s not the full match but it will be easier – and it’s as if you put in 6%!!. Next year do the same. Here is why even a little makes a difference — compound interest! Really the longer you have money in there to grow, the better. So it’s really best even if it’s only 3% to get started and then just let it grow.

Next you have to decide how to invest. Easiest is to pick a good “Target Date” fund. These are funds that are usually named with a date: Investment A 2050 or Investment B 2065. So which one to choose. Hopefully, your company has several in the fund offerings. Think about how long you plan to work and calculate the date you plan to retire — the earliest date. So if you are 30 and plan to retire at 67 then select one that is 35 years from now. You can change your strategy later if you need. The goal is to get started. The more time you have funds saved — the more time it has to grow. The target date funds will start more aggressive and then slowly move more conservative as it comes time to use the funds. So, as you get older you may want to start contributing to a fund with a later date (10 years or so) to cover your lengthy retirement.

Now, you are like “Hey, wait! What about the kid’s college?! Let’s get into that. Well by now you have your debt eliminated — at least the credit cards are paid. You are saving for retirement. What about a car or house payment? Have you saved money for a house? With the cost of buying house, let’s discuss college funds. Seriously, the earlier you start a college fund the better. A 529 plan can be your best bet. Each state offers one and you don’t even have to pick the one in your state. That said, if you can put some money into one to start the ‘snowball’ growing that is a huge help.

Maybe feeding the college fund is hard. Even $50 here and there will make a difference. Grandparents may even wish to contribute a yearly gift. Your goal of saving the possible $100-200k for each kid may not be practical. That said, if you can save enough for the first year for each kid — that can help them get started. Then help them pay while in school. And, if you can have them only borrow the last year or two of school and then you can pay the interest. This sentence looks simple but it’s not. The biggest issue with student loans is the interest and even though the payments don’t start until they graduate, the interest starts compounding.

If you can get your child the student loan that is the equivalent to a home equity line of credit then it will often allow for interest payments. This is critical to keep the snowball at bay. Let’s say your child borrows $20k a semester for the last 2 years at 7%. The interest is going to really start adding up. However, if while the kid is in school — you may not be able to pay the tuition but you can pay the interest. Therefore, your child’s loan may still be a serious chunk but not nearly as much since you paid the interest.

Rather than feel like you need to save/pay all of your kid’s college costs upfront, please remember your son or daughter can live with you after college. If you can let them live rent free or help with groceries, etc., they can work to pay off loans and save money. That is a huge help. Additionally, many companies offer tuition assistance to repay student loans. Please don’t sacrifice your retirement savings when your child has more options to get ahead. With the real estate market the way it is, saving and buying a home will be a different post!

In the end, your child will be most happy if you can fund a your own happy retirement without having to live with them! And this is a very comfortable place to be.

¹Aesop’s fables are a collection of ancient Greek stories, credited to the storyteller Aesop (c. 620–560 BCE) that teaches moral lessons. They often feature animals with human characteristics and are designed to convey a moral, such as “don’t judge a book by its cover” from The Lion and the Mouse or “slow and steady wins the race” from The Hare and the Tortoise. 

²Compound interest is the interest calculated on the initial principal amount plus any accumulated interest from previous periods. It is interest on interest, causing money to grow at an accelerating rate over time. This can be beneficial for savings and investments but costly for debts, as interest can grow quickly on both the original amount and the accrued interest.  This is why it is compared to a snowball that grows as it rolls downhill.

I am not being paid or sponsored for the mention of any companies or products. These comments are from personal experiences and I am providing links to either my blog or others for reference.

I loved the indoor mall full of local vetted craftsmen.  We walked down to the Long Wharf Pier and saw the “Boston Harbor.”   Very modern now with jets taking off from Logan Airport just across the Harbor.  While I am saying I enjoyed this walking tour, my body that is accustomed to the mostly desk sitting did not.  So a detour for Advil was required along with a festive and hot Peppermint Mocha to warm us up.  I can’t help thinking that “wow, I need to be training for old age!”

Now, with the New Year here I can’t put off that doctor’s quiet admonition, he wrote on the paper that you take up to the desk and hand them to check out, “diet and exercise.”   After several knee injuries, an ankle sprain and foot fracture I may have gained a pound or 10. So, I know he is not wrong and, in the past, I have successfully achieved a healthy weight.  However, in the past it may have been running (now out of the question), extreme calorie restriction (not healthy) or both — ended up sick.  Therefore, I started researching to see if there was anything new and healthy to try.  And there are some new schools of thought to approaching lifestyle changes but they still require will-power. I have heard that if you make something into a game, it is always more fun.  While this may not become your favorite game, it may help you “up your game!”  What game you say?

I think most folks are aware of the Jenga game of stacking little blocks and then pulling out blocks randomly to add to the top  — all the while trying not to have it collapse into a heap. Did you know the root of the word Jenga is from a Swahili word, kujenga, which means “to build.”

Recently, I have been reading about “Habit Stacking” where you take a habit you already have — a healthy habit and then stack a new healthy habit onto it to “build” your healthy routine.  Which also reminded me of Jenga … especially if you are trying to remove a bad habit and replace with a good habit on top of other good habits.    I couldn’t help but think about how this can be a metaphor for our diet and exercise habits.  Actually, most studies show that diet can have more impact than exercise on your weight.

Remember the old food pyramid? The USDA has redesigned the food pyramid to be “My Plate.” to aid in building a healthy diet. When looking at your diet, it’s not just about the calories but also the nutrient content. You may also hear folks talking about the “Macros” which is short for macronutrients. Macronutrients is a term used to describe the carbohydrates, fat and protein your body needs. And, not sure about you, but I am very sensitive to sodium so I am always looking to achieve a balance of the electrolytes.  What I have found is, it’s not just about the liquid electrolytes but balancing the sodium and potassium content in your solid food can really improve your blood pressure.  This is now starting to get complicated!   And, it can be a bit overwhelming at first.  

So we need a way to make this more of a game. Food Tower! is what I am going to call this New Year’s eat healthy game. I really would love to call it Food Jenga! but Jenga is actually trademarked! In our Food Tower game, and in keeping with the aforementioned habit stacking, we can break this down to pulling out a block and replacing it with a healthy block. Habit Stacking, like in Jenga and your electrolytes, balance is key!

Good eating habits can also go along with saving money. Even though everyone has been complaining about the prices of groceries, there are things you can do. Tiny good habits can stretch your groceries, improve your health and save you money  The roasted turkey was actually enough for two people for several meals. So even though it may have looked expensive (approx. $19), the whole meal above cost about $35 to buy the ingredients (minus the wine). So per person per meal brought it down to less than $10 per person which honestly is less than 4 people eating at a fast food restaurant and arguably more healthy. Cooking a turkey breast on a Sunday would provide a lovely meal and then the meat can be sliced for sandwiches for lunches.

Cooking fresh and/or frozen veggies (without sauces) are naturally low in sodium and low in calories. Also, even if you have no time and you make the frozen pasta meals, throwing in a handful of frozen veggies can stretch the meal, add potassium and fiber. Frozen peas also add zero cholesterol plant-based, protein. Keep bags of peas, corn or your favorite veg, in your freezer to add extra veggies in to your diet. Also, if you have a pup, you can help with your pup’s diet — steam some peas and before you add butter or seasonings, scoop a tablespoon or two out to cool. Mix in with your pup’s dinner to provide some extra low-fat nutrition.

One of the keys to changing your habits is to realize it takes on average 3 weeks for something to become a habit. Therefore, it can be best to slowly add in or otherwise stack the new habits. Perhaps, create a plan to swap out one bad habit for a good habit each month, using the habit-stacking idea. So think about what new habits that you can do to replace a bad habit or add in to improve your health, wallet and over all life. Small changes that you stick with will be easier and lead to a much healthier life which is a very comfortable place to be.

Where did the summer go? Like a beautiful butterfly it flitted away …. and this year we have had a fall with lots of colorful leaves and blue skies. One thing I love about living in the North East is the seasons — well, winter is not always white but, it is usually more than cold enough for me!

Thanksgiving is only a few days away and I, along with everyone else, have been making multiple trips to the store. My church has been organizing baskets for meals for the community for those in need. This year my grown son is home visiting and helped me shop and it was so nice to have him to navigate the store with the cart! So while I am trying to finish shopping for our meal and asking my son what would he like for sides, I was trying to shop for family I know not. So I picked a lot of the same things I would for me and I wondered…. do they have a child who says “they like apple pie and pumpkin about the same so either is fine?” So which one to make….

I really only like pumpkin things for Thanksgiving … shhhh. So in the basket went pumpkin pie fixings — we aren’t supposed to put in perishable items and pumpkin calls for evaporated milk and there is now a version that calls for condensed milk too so I grabbed one for them. At my home, we are going for the classic. Isn’t this the time for the classic, traditional family favorites? I hope the family that receives our basket enjoys the food selection to include some Mac-N-Cheese! I added that in due to a friend’s suggestion. While it was not a regular on our holiday table (my southern mom made candied yams), I do know many people who require it and it has to be from a trusted family cook! What are some of your family favorites?

I have been enjoying asking people what are they making for their big meal. So many surprising answers for a holiday that has a ‘standard’ Turkey menu? I love how families have often created their own holiday traditions, sometimes deliberate and sometimes not. I love the laid back, take all day to cook the meal and smelling all the goodness all day long! Often we have only a light breakfast followed by snacking only so we can best enjoy the seasonal feast. When it is only me and my son, I do often make things “lighter” and this year I was able to get the “lighter” version of the turkey. Yes, I got a turkey breast and it is mostly all the white meat … no Henry the VIIIth turkey legs and only 6.26 lbs.

My friends were discussing prices per pound and fresh or frozen for their turkey and I have to admit … I went for the one that would fit in my freezer. What?! Am I the only one that has to worry about freezer space.

Isn’t that part of the planning and strategic shopping so that we can have all of the ingredients at the right time. My Merry MJ Holiday Dinner post talks about how to plan your cooking and how to make some quick and easy versions for when you don’t want the whole day in the kitchen. Or if you want the “experience” without the mega-leftovers.

So, how to use the leftovers? My son loves turkey and will eat turkey sandwiches throughout the year. Folks may have forgotten in our rush to hurry through the holidays, that a long time ago, people used to make big Sunday dinners throughout the year. Maybe your grandparents did too. Part of saving money and eating healthy is meal planning and using leftovers. Before pre-packaged lunch meat and meal prepping were a ‘thing,” folks did meal prep by cooking a large roast beef or chicken or turkey on a Sunday. This was often used for sandwiches and lunches and quick dinners during the week. I know this is not the time of year to think about saving money or eating healthy — that is for after Christmas!

I love to talk about food and Christmas, dare I speak so early about that holiday? Last year, I tried to make a “Roast Beast” or rather a Beef Wellington — ala Italian style, Giada’s Italian Beef Wellington. I should say I did make a Beef Wellington with sun-dried tomato pesto and prosciutto and it was delicious. Perhaps a bit over done for my son as I tried to ensure it wouldn’t be too rare for me. My son still loved it!

I have now learned that some people make individual ‘wellies’ and I think that might even be better as I would like more puff pastry on mine! This year, I have seen someone posting a crown rib roast on Facebook and it looks magnificent. I am now thinking that could be my next cooking extravaganza! Some people want to climb mountains and I tackle intermediate to hard cooking challenges. One day, I will also try to bake some Macarons all from the comfort of my own home! However you choose to celebrate the holiday, whether at home with a family feast or visiting faraway places, may you have a delicious meal to make it a comfortable place to be.

It’s that time of year again and, wow …. This year blew by!  I hope this post finds you well, and you were able celebrate with your loved ones!  I had a lovely Thanksgiving with my family and I am especially grateful my dad, my siblings and I and all of our practically grown kids were all together.  Christmas was also wonderful as I was able to spend it at home with loved ones.   While New Year’s Eve was quiet, it was welcomed to be able to rest and reflect on the year past and look forward to a new year and a fresh start.

There is an interesting book, The 5 Love Languages, that discusses how everyone has things that they equate with caring and makes them feel special and loved.  This may sound like a simple thing but it is important to understand what makes your loved one feel loved!  This is especially important at the holidays whether you celebrate Hanukkah or Christmas or Kwanza.  Selecting the perfect gift for someone is part science and part art and perhaps a bit of intuition.  Bear in mind that for some folks, they may prefer an ‘Experience’ or an ‘Act of Service” (doing something kind for them) as their perfect gift.  I have been told that people are often suspicious of someone is who is always nice, but kind is often confused for nice.  Given all the stress and strife with the pandemic, we all can use some niceness and kindness.  Most important of all — a simple gesture of love is often enough!  A visit, a hug or just a smile can make a huge difference in someone’s life.  With Suicide at its highest rate this time of year, the best gift may be friendship.

My mom used to say that we should celebrate birthdays as that is how we say that we are glad the person was born! I have held onto this saying and believe it is true.  What better way of showing love than to celebrate the day someone was born!  For Christians, this is celebrating Jesus’s birth.  I love hearing about everyone’s special holiday memories and special recipes.  No surprise, food is one of my love languages!  I hope that you and your family can slow down and carry-on family traditions and recipes.  I often make a great coffee cake — it’s not too sweet and the cinnamon streusel is very apropos at the holidays.  Please click on the coffee cake link to see the recipe and instructions. It’s an easier cake than you make think.

Every year, the holidays are usually fun, stressful, joyful and lots of other things all rolled into a few hectic months!  Often, we are so swept up that it can be hard to see that we are making future memories and we don’t need to be perfect.  Our perfectly imperfect holidays are enough!  I hope the holidays have brought you what you wished for and may the New Year bring you and yours a refreshing start for your best year yet.   And, if we can be grateful and create connections and… learn the life lessons, forgive and love then we can have the best life.  Hope 2023 is your best year yet!